28 January 2008

Power Struggles

Monday 28Jan08 7pm

As I walked home today and was thinking about my blog entry as a way to shove off the aggravation of work, my mind flit back to the power struggle of July 2007 and how both my friend Jojo and I felt that it triggered my debilitating pain that laid me up for a few months. I wondered if it is time to think about my next direction. Seems the power struggle has resurfaced and ofcourse Mercury is Retrograde and Pluto has moved in Capricorn, will flit back to Sagittarius for a minute and will stay in Capricorn for something like 15 years. I sat up last night reading about it in The Mountain Astrologer and it scared the pants off me.

What I can remember without going back to the magazine was stuff like governmental control, things going to more of a Conservative leaning (heavy conservative), issues with the way that people are managed. Slavery in the US started when Pluto was in Capricorn. Dictatorships and fascism had their best heydays when Pluto was in Capricorn. blah blah blah. Stuff about New World Order. Serious tensions and rebellions. Scary shit! Let's hope Obama gets elected as President and let's double hope we get rid of Stephen Harper, but he's here now and our Liberal leader isn't Gerrard Kennedy.

In a smaller way, I've felt the change at work with the new regime. I've said a couple of times, it's like they are trying to say that we are a team and then pulling dictatorship tactics. It calmed for a while because my boss spoke up but slowly it's been seeping in once again. I've told my boss that when he ultimately leaves, I'd like to go with him but who knows what can happen. The powers that be already have a chosen person for the position I would take. Or my boss decides to go another route himself. So somehow I know that I need to stop allowing my mind to live in it and I need to let my mind create what I want. There are a number of things that call me, like animals and art and independence and and. I haven't quite found a way to go live in the woods like a present day Grizzly Adams with high speed internet yet. ha ha Oh yes and enough ground to have some sort of animal sanctuary, a cat retirement home, maybe my dream man can be a Vet!

I haven't a clue what I was going to say! ha ha!

Aquarian Stuff

Monday 6pm 28Jan08

I'm always waiting for the latest New Millenium Being when the sign changes because I'm always interested in what to look at during that particular sign. Guru Rattana doesn't always get them out as soon as I would hope and I've since started to go back through her past issues for that particular sign to see what I can glean from them. There is always general stuff that you can focus on without necessarily knowing what planets are retrograde or direct and so forth. Other things remain the same, like the full moon is always in the opposite sign (Jan 22nd was in Leo) and the New Moon is always in the current sign.

So today I was reading on the past issues for Aquarius since that's what sign we are in. Happy Birthday Lolo!
I had a little chuckle when I read that my issues with unsolicited advice actually runs high in an Aquarian month and specifically the Leo Full Moon.

A quote from the New Millennium Being Number 81, Feb 3, 2004 issue says: "We are often challenged by our tribe mates, who are not happy with our behavior and disagree with our decisions. They openly or covertly pressure us to conform, rather than evolve. These growth periods breed inner conflict. Instinctively we fear exile, censorship and punishment for daring to have our own voice. The possibility of rejection makes us anxious. At the same time, your soul's need to be your own boss uncovers feelings of rebellion. In our hearts we know we will feel better when we allow more of true nature to be expressed and emerge and develop our individual approach to life and living."

"Those with an Aquarius Sun, Moon, Ascendant or multiple planets in Aquarius or the 11th house are innately rebellious and independent and have a visceral aversion to tribal dictates." Didn't I check my chart and didn't I find 4 or 5 planets in the 11th house? Interesting!

Some notes I've gleaned from the NMB's from 2004 to 2007 are as follows:

Leo Full Moon (the effects can be as long as a month)
- we can't suppress our creative urges without negative consequences. The real satisfaction comes when our creations uplift, entertain or support others.
- to grow we have to change. We break through our ego barriers (Leo) and take a giant step toward setting ourselves free (Aquarius).
- clarify our priorities, claim our power, recognize the disparities between our dreams and our reality and evaluate where we want to go next.
- Our soul has a chosen set of circumstances and personal qualities this lifetime. We can't change them. The first prerequisite for a happy life is to accept who we are. This makes it possible to more fully explore the possibilities where we are at choice and to embrace our gifts and challenges.

Aquarius New Moon
- lofty ideas need to be grounded in practical plans and realistic schedules for their implementation
- focus on chage, progress, transformation, evolution and our highest ideals. The Aquarian mission is to heal the wounds of alienation, isloation, inequality and injustice.
- What is your unique and vital role? What is your next step to more actively contribute to planetary healing?

Aquarius and his mentor Uranus
- represent our curiousity, our need to respond to new challenges and mental stimuli, our personal hopes, dreams, wishes, and our altruistic ideals for humanity.
- listen to our intuition
- We meet our destiny when we are called upon to do what we didn't think we could do and what we have never done before.
- What have I been dreaming of doing? Where have I not given myself the space to expand and enrich my life by making excuses or being afraid to change?
- We need to ask ourselves what we need. Perhaps (1) Time out from our routines to detach or use our creative energy for other productive endeavors. (2) A chance to view our life and the world through another set of lenses, where we can gain a clear, objective and more encompassing perspective. (3) An opening to evaluate relationships, habits, beliefs, our job circumstances that determine what we are doing with our life.
- the need to tak a new direction. The more we accept and deal positively with change, the less we suffer health problems. We have to become conscious and move out of denial whether we want to or not. Resisting change and holding on to the past can lead to accidents. If we are not willing, we are awakened against our will. Listen to and follow our internal guidance.

In the 2006 New Millenium Being Guru Rattana offers a physical exercise for grounding and containing your spiritual energy during Aquarius.
In the 2004 NMB, Number 81 she offers a simple meditation. In Number 82, a Self Love Meditation. And in NMB 115 she offers a bunch of goodies as well.
You can either subscribe to her monthly newletters or scroll down and click on a back issue at: http://www.yogatech.com/nmb/ (as always click the title of this entry to go to the website.)


27 January 2008

Unsolicited Advice

Sunday 27Jan08 12:33pm

Have I mentioned that I'm not a fan of unsolicited advice? It drives me crazy. I get that most times people mean well when they announce how they think you should (big should) live your life. What drives me crazy about it the most is that when I respond with some comment as to why that's nice information but this is what I'm doing with my life, the person refuses to 'hear' what I am saying.

Out at the bar about a week ago, one of the women asked me if they'd end up in my novel. I laughed and said, "No, maybe in ten years! You need to have distance from something in order to make it true fiction."
I didn't think anythng more about it. Because, although I have fun at the bar, it's not really something I'll ever write about. But in all situations people always ask if they'll end up in my novel so I try to have a nice answer. What I really want to say is that it's not that interesting to end up in a novel but instead say maybe in ten years because people feel that you think they are more interesting than they are.

This week, my dream buddy says, " I know you say that you wait ten years before you write about something but I THINK you should write about it now. You can't remember everything and it's important to record things to remember them."
I tell him, "That was just an arbitrary number, 10 years. I journal what inspires me or what stands out in my mind but my fiction isn't me just taking what's happened and fictionalizing it. My fiction is fiction. Plus I have enough novel ideas to keep me busy for twenty years."
"Well, you should write things down to keep yourself up with ideas... blah blah blah."
"Okay buddy, you are not listening to me." And he got that, "I'm right" expression on his face as those unsolicited self proclaimed guru's get because I am too stubborn to realize that they know what's right for me.

I just have to say, because it needs to be said, When you're life is perfect maybe then you can tell me what you think I should be doing in my life and how I should do it. When you're life is perfect, I'll ask you specific questions about your area of expertise. It's always what I love to say, "You don't ask a poor person for advice on how to get rich, because clearly he doesn't know how to get rich. And you don't ask someone whose life isn't working how to go after your dreams. I'm just saying.

I find myself saying to so many people when they insist their advice on me, "I didn't ask!" But it generally falls on deaf ears.
Now I'm not saying that I don't ever listen to anyone. But there are those people who think they know me and people who really do know me. I know the people who know me by what they say to me. They are the people who listen, ask questions and suggest rather than insist. There are people that I ask, "what's your opinion on this?"

On the flip side, it's so nice to have people in my life that get me. My girlfriend who mentioned that my returning to blogging made her sigh with relief. Not once had she ever said, when I wasn't blogging, "You know if you start blogging you'll get out of your 2007 funk." My girlfriend who kept pushing me to come out when I was in pain because she knew that even if I got out for an hour, I would know that I wasn't going through it alone. She didn't tell me I should get out, she just tried to push to it. If I told her to stop she would have but deep inside I knew she was right and I was impressed that she knew how to get me out without giving me advice.

I've been trying to, as I've read somewhere, to just smile and say thanks for sharing with the self proclaimed guru's of my life. But I find what happens is they think it's an opening for more, "this is what you should be doing rants."
I look for areas in my life where I may be doing the same thing, but I'm so mindful of how annoying it is to act like you know everything that I honestly don't believe I do it to people. I'll say, "this is what I've done, when I've been in that situation," but I never say, "you should do this." Who the heck am I to say to anyone, "you should do this?"

Who is anybody to say that? What if there is a path that we are meant to follow? What if we are supposed to struggle at some things, procrastinate at others, excel at some, and just plain try all the wrong avenues before we find our proper place? What if every moment of our lives, is our proper place?

Even with deaths, I'm starting to look at them from a different perspective. I never say any more that some one has died prematurely. What if the death isn't premature? What if their purpose was to have a short life? There is nothing more inspiring to get us to live our lives fully than the example of some one dying young. A person's life is an example to someone to live more, or try more.

I don't know. I've never claimed to have the answers. I just have things that I want to work on overcoming or handling. And being given unsolicited advice is a biggie. If I'm going to make an effort to maintain more relationships with people who don't necessarily get me, I have to, for myself, look at ways to accept that from people without feeling all knotted up about it.

I receive a boatload of emails from different newsletters around the world on working on my stuff. It interests me. I don't always read all the emails but on some days one of the subjects will catch my eye and I'll read the email. I've been receiving emails from Byron Katie for over a year and only read an email just recently. I clicked on to her website and listened/watched her you tube video on what she teaches called, "The Work."

It's interesting work. Especially when I found out that she had also suffered from depression for a number of years and got herself out of it by changing her thinking. As is You Tube's way, after you watch one video, it offers similar videos and I came upon one from Janaka or is it Janaki? I'll have to check again.

It was a goodie! It was ofcourse about how we all want to help others and feel that we know what is best for them. And how about we choose to believe that they are doing the right things for themselves and ultimately that we are doing what is right for ourselves. The link to that video is : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lhO0UDwfza4

Click the title to be forewarded to it. Interesting work, The Work.


22 January 2008

Mercury Retrograde

Oh joy, it's that time again. Mercury goes retrograde on January 28th! I've been having computer problems at work since the last one, I think! ha ha! I hope that's the only thing that drives me crazy, although that is supposed to be fixed tomorrow.
I started Lolo's birthday gift before the retrograde but won't be sending it anytime soon, since it will probably get lost in the mail on the way to South Korea, or it will be sent back because she'll be in Thailand!

I haven't been feeling the communication issues early that I normally feel, so hopefuly... hopefully.
Of course, as is my lot, any man that shows an interest in me seems to be on the cusp of Mercury Retrograding. So, the good thing is that I will be forced to slow things way down before I make any type of decision. Allthough that dark hair and those dark eyes (my weakness) make it very difficult for me to keep away or even an arm's length.

Anyhow, from Astrology Zone's Susan Miller, I paste her definition of what you should and shouldn't do:

"At several points throughout the year most of us will be bombarded with the maddening effects of Mercury in retrograde. Mercury is a planet which governs all transportation and communication issues. Mercury is not an emotional planet, but rather a highly objective, truth-seeking one. It rules intelligence, education and truth. When it is in retrograde, some of its power is held back.

When Mercury starts turning in an apparent backward motion, we will start to feel the effects of this event days or even as far as two weeks earlier. When the planet normalizes we will see the tempo of events pick up in our lives as the planet becomes "stationary" and then speeds forward.

Gemini and Virgo are signs ruled by Mercury, so if you are one of those born during those months, you will be complaining especially loudly. If you work in the industries ruled by this planet such as sales, writing, public relations, advertising, publishing, air freight, the post office or express mail, any transportation industry, from the airlines to Amtrak, you'll also be especially vulnerable to this planet's weird motions in September. (If you are a Gemini, for example, who works in publishing, it's no use calling in for a month of mental health days--you can't escape!)

What happens when Mercury retrogrades? You miss appointments, your computer equipment crashes, checks get lost, you find the car you just purchased during Mercury retrograde is a lemon. (Or, you hate your haircut, the lamp you bought shorts out, your sister hates her birthday gift.) There will be countless delays, cancellations and postponements--but know these will benefit you in the long run. Don't fight them, although your frustration level and feeling of restlessness will be hard to cope with at times.

All machinery and things with moving parts--such as computers, VCRs, camera equipment, garbage disposals, and so forth, will reveal any weak links now. It is critical that you back up your data system and be more careful and vigilant than ever. Projects will demand more time and money than anticipated this month.

In matters of the heart, if your boyfriend or girlfriend breaks up with you or says something hurtful, take a wait-and-see attitude. Since Mercury rules speech, they may not mean what you think they are saying now. Let them have some space, and wait to see if they mean in October what they said in September.

When traveling, leave early and allow for extra travel time. Have all bags double-taped closed, count your belongings, double-check addresses and reconfirm appointments. Things get lost when Mercury messes us up. Take NOTHING for granted. The sector of your chart that Mercury happens to be skating through will be effected most dramatically, so check your forecast!

Why would the Universe give us Mercury retrograde? Because to move forward it is sometimes necessary to backtrack and reconfigure our paths in life. It is important to reconsider, repair, reflect, and reconnect. Mercury forces us to slow down and fix what's broken, and in so doing, rethink things. It also gives us time to get to projects we have put on the back-burner.

Some activities are lucky or actually improve when Mercury retrogrades. You are likely to bump into old friends that you haven't seen in years. Adopted children tend to find their birth parents during Mercury retrograde periods, or people locate their long lost siblings. Prosecutors often find clues to crimes that had previously remained unsolved for years. (Although sometimes the reverse is true--there is a greater danger, or example, that police can bungle evidence during a Mercury retrograde period, for clear thinking doesn't come easy for any of us then.) Mail that went astray weeks or even years ago shows up during Mercury retrograde. Some things that were lost reappear.

Now is also a good time to dress old wounds, clean up relationships or to simply bury the hatchet. Some people have great breakthroughs in psychotherapy during a Mercury retrograde period. For salesman, it is a positive time to backtrack over previous contacts rather than call on new ones. It is a perfect time to schedule work on projects that you haven't had time to do and you've let pile up. Bring your resume or portfolio up to date, and clean out your closets. Take time to paint the house. Clear your decks.

Just try not to start new things. If you have to start a job during a Mercury retrograde period know that the nature of the job is likely to change dramatically over time. Perhaps the person you report to will leave, or your responsibilities will be very different from what you thought they would be. Or your company won't be ready to take you on, and you won't have much to do until things are reorganized. But remember, if this was a position that you tried for in the past, then you've got the vibes working for you rather than against you."


20 January 2008

Podcasts - My New Addiction

Sunday 20Jan08 12:31pm

I inadvertently caught on to Podcasts by watching Creflo Dollar's message. I sometimes go looking for his show on television first thing in the morning simply to start the day with something positive in my mind. At the end of one show I noticed that he had podcasts available through Itunes.

"Hmm, I should check that out then I won't have to flip around on the television trying to find his show."

Don't I go to the podcast section and find out that, 1) Podcasts are free! and 2) There is a boatload of them!
Jumpin' Jehosephat! Ha ha! So I proceeded to download way too many podcasts of all types and now I need to actually listen to them.

The one I am currently listening to is " A New Love Movement." In the episode, he is listing off the 50 Life Lessons/ Rules.
I post the rules and the link to the blog (click the title) for anyone who is interested...



50 Life Lessons/Rules

The following is by Regina Brett The Plain Dealer, Cleveland, Ohio

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
4. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their
journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God
never blinks.
16. Life is too short for long pity parties. Get busy living, or get
busy dying.
17. You can get through anything if you stay put in today.
18. A writer writes. If you want to be a writer, write.
19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one
is up to you and no one else.
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no
for an answer.
21 Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie.
Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Over-prepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: "In five years,
will this matter?"
27. Always choose life, not suicide.
28. Forgive everyone everything.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends
will. Stay in touch.
34 God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did
or didn't do.
35. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.
36. Growing old beats th e alternative -- dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood. Make it memorable.
38. Read the Psalms. They cover every human emotion.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's,
we'd grab ours back.
41. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
42. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
43. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
44. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
45. The best is yet to come.
46 No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
47. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
48. If you don't ask, you don't get.
49. Yield.
50. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.